A chair is still chair even when there's no one sitting there

All my life, I have always been the first, best or earliest or among those who were, in everything.

Marks
Grades
Finishing school
Most popular kid in school (this is my post and i'll write whatever i want)
Sent overseas
Graduate
Get a job
Buy a car

Listing those things down made me realise of how much I have to be grateful for. But now that the time has passed, everyone seems to be on a level playing field once again. And I've began to realise that a lot of my peers have already moved forward one by one slowly leaving me trailing behind.

Facebook has been a complicated tool for me. It is the place where I bash my daily rantings, it is my stage as a one liner stand up comedian, it is a tool for my anger management, my reliable grapevine. But it is also the place where I get my friends' wedding announcements.

At first it was quite a shocker for me when the first few announced their weddings. I was excited, elated even. As the number grew, I got a little more anxious. The pace was so incredible that I began to worry to end up as an old maid (or whatever the male equivalent is). Slowly, it became so common that I began to ignore them, as in, oh-it's-juts-another-friend-getting-hitched.

But when a very close friend invited me to his wedding, I couldn't help but to feel happy, sad, panic, jealous, angry, even betrayed all in one not-so-happy-meal.

I guess you can't always be the first, best or earliest in everything. There are things that you can get just by putting a little more effort in it, but some things are just not meant to be hurried. Those things are usually matters of the heart. And the matter of the heart is the matter of fate. And fate is in His powers. And He alone decides when anything will happen, if it happens.

For now, I may be the first to be able to afford a house, but to have a home, I simply will have to wait.


A chair is still a chair, even when there's no one sittin' there
But a chair is not a house and a house is not a home
When there's no one there to hold you tight
And no one there you can kiss goodnight
A house is not a home - Luther Vandross/Chris Colfer(Glee)

At seven I was smarter than most ten-year-olds, at fourteen smarter than a seventeen-year-old, at seventeen smarter than a twenty-year old. Twenty-four now, I was no smarter than any other twenty-four-year-old around the place and anyway, it's no longer a race and there were no more prizes for being a prodigy. Everyone had caught up with me and I knew, I understood with sharp gutstab of horror, that the danger now was that I would stand still while they raced past. One self-righteous, puritanical little outburst was permissible, surely before I began the uphill slog to discipline and diligence, integrity and industry, caution and care? I was allowed to kick and scream just once as I watched the dazzle and brilliance of youth cloud over.
Michael Young MA,
Making History by Stephen Fry