El amor, no es como lo pintan

I just realised something about myself, and it made me think that I am sick. Sick, I tell you.

Make it go away!

***

I hate having infatuation. I personally believe that it's a sin. It's sinful if it has an impact on your daily life. Makan tak kenyang, tidur tak lena, mandi tak basah, buang air tak pam.

I hate it, when you can't seem to stop thinking about her.... him, or it.

This is what Wiki had to say about it

Infatuation is the state of being completely carried away by unreasoned passion or love; addictive love. Usually one is inspired with an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for someone.

Infatuation is a common emotion characterized by unrealistic expectations of blissful passion without positive relationship growth or development. Infatuation is distinguished by a lack of trust, loyalty, commitment, and reciprocity. In the case of infatuation, there is more often than not an obsessor and an object of desire (generally unattainable). One may come to the conclusion that unlike love, infatuation is not usually mutual.

It makes me sound so pathetic

J'aurais tant à lui dire
si j'avais su parler.
Comment lui faire lire
au fond de mes pensées?

Can't even think straight nowadays.

***

I think soap operas are funny. Especially the American soap or the Latin telenovelas. You can have a scene where someone is boiling water to make some tea today, and you'd be lucky if the tea is ready in 6 months.

Everyone is living their own soap opera. Everyone has had that scene where everything is falling apart, or that rare moments of pure happiness, bits and pieces of drama and suspense, the cunningly-mischievous back stabbing friend, everything that makes a soap opera what it is, save for the fact that not everyone is as good looking as those people who actually act in soap operas for a living.

I would say right now, if my life were a soap opera, it would be a cliffhanger, right before the end of an episode, complete with the 'ching ching ching ching' suspense background sound and those dreadful words saying 'to be continued' at the bottom of the screen.

We'll just have to tune into the same channel, same time, some of these days, to see what happens next.